SNUGGLE NOOK: The Next Generation

[Maxen]

Not everybody thought of Gary with fondness...

I hasten to add, I had untold respect for the man. Even if I agree with some of this guys points here...

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Oh and here's a magnificent picture, so very characterful (my current desktop background)

It's like those pub-pictures, but for us roleplaying geeks!

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Here's a stat-graph showing D&D (1st edition, 2nd edition, etc.) All of them apart from Hack-Master. It's a comparison of how the lethality has gone down steadily throughout the decades since the birth of rovus.

This is a comparison of each of the D&D editions

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Well, this new simplified critical-hit system (just rolling a D24) has back-fired spectacularly, at the very least it provides an amusing storyline for my coming web-comic. I have downloaded HackSack for Linux (a java prog' which calculates crits, amongst a host of other handy things). Despite the lack of hack in recent weeks, rekindling my friendship with the eminent Conan is good. He will be having a stab at GMing sometime. Also, we've resumed development on Conan's character generator. My role is primarily typing out cross-platform XML data files, coming up with ideas, and leaving the heavy coding to him (I'm a Bard with Scroll-Use, not a Wizard like Conan, Toast or Cyborg.)

Maggy has been round and we've been caining Icewindale a lot, due to the lack of players. We were due to enjoy Hannibal's adventure, but t'was a no show. Gerhard won't be attending for a while (domestic responsibilities) and Cassidy & co. seem to have lost interest. It looks like LAN parties and Wargaming (3rd. Ed. F.B. - Old School, Slaves To Darkness, Lost & the Damned, WarBands, etcetera) for the moment; but as soon as we get a proper session in, I'll let y'all know. Must rovus. Need find rovus. Pubcon?...

[Maxen]

Here's an essential piece of software if you want to play D&D. Encounter generator. Treasure Generator. Critical-hit calculator, it's the best. I've had to split it, but that's kewl (the fact that UKrp have expanded there upload capacity considerably has been well noticed, nice one admin. Sincerely.)

Oops! Looks like that only applies to '.exe' files, and not '.rar' archives. Oh well. Looks like I have to split this file more than once. Twelve times in-fact. Still, this is gawd-damn essential for making gaming sessions run smoothly. Rather than split the file a dozen times, I've pasted a link to it.

http://gc.greycouncil.us/HackSACK/

Of course if you play 3.5 or whatever, you won't need this program. This is just for 1st & 2nd Edition AD&D & Hack-Master. Unlucky punks!

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3.5

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BTW it is so on this weekend, Ezekiel confirmed, Hannibal too, Saemus aswell have all said they'd be there, no Gerhard tho and I doubt we'll see Cassidy, it's the old-skool crew back together teaming up with fellow G.M. Ezekiel though he runs a 3.5 game (yeuch!) I can't hold that against him! He's still a roleplayer after all, and a thoroughly British one at that, so you gotta give him respect for G.M.ing, whatever my personal feelings about his particular brand of D&D ANYway like I said: we're gettin' the band back together this weekend, then it's off to Southampton where I might add, Hannibal is planning on running a second Hack-Master adventure there (PubCon 2) if anyone is up for it, if anyone is game, just be there man. I've even drawn up my own coloured pencilled sign up form, Snuggle Nook style, with bubbly letters and loads of cartoony colour, even the odd frame from Knights of the Dining Table the parody of the parody I am working on currently.

BTW I heard that Ukrp: "I'm thrilled to announce that Beat to Quarters has been awarded the honour of being the joint 2010 Game of the Year by ukroleplayers.com" WICKED man!! We're on FIRE! Keep up the good work everyone here at the site, I'm on the flex, you dudes stay on the flex too, maybe I'll see you sausage-side in southampton, who knows, all the very best and more, Max-out.

[Maxen]

Short But Sweet Rovusession

Written at 1:19 afore midi on the 28th of Mars, in this the year 2011 Anno Domini. Stay on the flex.

Ezekiel the human Monk from Stonæ clung to a damp moss-covered wall, in shackles, surrounded by other prisoners. He tried using his Ironskin to prepare himself for the impending shock of trying his Eagle Claw artial arts manoeuvre, to try and force the shackles out of the wall, unfortunately t'was to little or no avail (he rolled a critical failure but his Opportunist talent let him swing it by just enough, so he avoided any nasty results rolling on the D1000 fumble table). One of the prisoners to Ezekiel's left started making a loud racket; another prisoner next to him started humming a low drone-like noise, chanting. The noisy prisoner was instantly made still. Then light spilled through the door of the cell-block as phosphor lamps burned brightly from outside. Noise drifted through the dank corridor, low snarling grunts of orcish, followed by the sound of an alarm being raised.

“Shoot!”, said Maggy McFinnigan II in annoyance, as the young half-elven rogue-mage sprung a hidden trip-wire in the undergrowth. The whole forested undergrowth outside of the keep was lit up like new-year Hogmonay. (She rolled a critical failure on her Stealth roll) Trailing behind her, not far, and hidden well within the folds of the bushes in her Cloak of Elvenkind was Maggy's mother, her royal princess Maud McFinnigan-Reginaulde I (half-elven rogue, smuggler package). Heir to the throne of the Elfaen-isle, Fernwick, and O'Finniga. Mother and daughter looked about with their keen-elven senses to spy four or so orcs, coming out from beyond the keep, to investigate the source of the intrusion. The two regents were on a diabolic, insidious mission of regicide. The rumour about Milborne town was that Sophia of Eltharion, last remaining heir to the Elfæn-Kingdom was trapped inside the broken-spire keep. The evil queens conspired against their rival, compelled to seek her out whilst in isolation, and secure their claim to the throne.

Meanwhile, back down below, Paco-Jay Meadri, the black-elf death-mage watched Ezekiel then thought to himself, why not try that. Having only a meagre 6% chance to succeed, he rolled them bones and boom! He made it! Immediately striking the shackles on Ezekiel to try and liberate his comrade, Paco-Jay's strikes were initially ineffective, but on the third hit, he managed it, the manacle failing it's saving throw vs. crushing blow. They still had the cell doors to get through, and could see from up the stairwell, at least a dozen orcs moving with speed in the distance. They seemed to be going somewhere, away from the prison complex.

The minute she spied the orcs, Maud shot an arrow at an incoming greenskin, the arrow struck the orc in the gullet, but the monster kept on coming, unfettered it snapped the arrow-shaft off and moved towards the two elven maidens. Maggy cast, an incandescent breath of flame lept forth from her fingers, a scorching gout of fire knocked out three orcs, just coming out of the keep gates. Turns out it was actually merely an illusionary Phantasmal Fireball, did the trick nicely. Maud's second bow-shot went wide, her trained pet ferret went to fetch the stray arrow.

Downstairs, Sgt. Lyn S. Cassidy, Jedi Warrior used his mental prowess to open the lock on the cell door. He had been blathering earlier about some things unfamiliar to our friends. Power-outlets, light-bulbs, strange bizarre sounding words to the antiquated heroes of yesteryear. (He's from the future, based on George Clooney's character in The Men that Stare at Goats) Alas, the three of them heading out forgetting about Sophia, leaving the other prisoners behind. So Lyn, Paco-Jay and Ezekiel moved outside. Lyn headed up the line cautiously. Then Paco-Jay came flying out from behind him, his manacles slamming against an orcs head, smashing it into the wall. The orc flailed about, failed his Threshold of Pain check, and slumped to the floor, brown bread. Lyn tried to use the Echmeir Technique knife-aficiando attack (even though he was unarmed). He fell flat on his face, rolling a 1, fumble! This gave a one of the bad-guys attacking him +2 to hit for the remainder of the encounter. Anyway. Ezekiel whirled about using a combination of Pain Touch and Stunning Touch strikes using his mental-focus Sung Hoy style martial arts manoeuvres. He failed to pull off the Pain but knocked an orc flat on his back with a Called Shot to the neck.

Back outside the castle walls, Maud slipped away into the undergrowth, her Cloak of Elvenkind shifting with the colours of the trees, the only trace of her passing was the sight of a tiny ferret, fetching an arrow to her. Maggy was in hand to hand now, a pair of orcs approaching, one already within striking distance. As the rogue-mage started casting, this prompted the usual attack of opportunity. Maggy made her concentration check easily. Still she took three damage, but kept it together enough to cast Burning Hands downing another pair of greenskins, who writhed around in the flames amidst a burning sea of twigs and branches.

The bad-guys fought back. Boom! Ezekiel was tagged with a Severity Level Five critical hit to the top of his left foot. Apart from having some nasty movement penalties for the time-being, and a bit of permanent scarring, he was okay-ish. The other remaining orcs attacked the three escaping prisoners. One fumbled, several missed, a few hit Paco-Jay but not for much damage. Lyn made it away unscathed luckily.

Maud let loose another arrow, this time a magickal +3 sheaf arrow, wham! Twelve points of damage (a whopping amount for a bow), then her second shot took the last remaining orc in-sight down. We couldn't decide which was the worse term to use with ladies present: penetration or open-ended double damage. Anyway. Maggy switched to her martial arts, and closed for the attack. Covering the ground between her and the gate. Her mother in tow, not far behind.

Ezekiel regained his composure and wham! A series of Crushing Blow attacks nailed another two orcs out flat! Shame he couldn't do Follow Through Damage, as a result of the crit' he took recently. (Damn this new computer roleplaying-aid program Hack-Sack is great for cutting down on the red-tape number crunching, also helping keep track of crit' effects and stuff. Wicked man!) Anyhow. Where were we. (It's late and I'm really baked after a mammoth Icewindale after-roleplay session with Saemus. My bard is nearly level six now, woohoo!) Anyhow. Like I was saying, where were we? Oh yes! Paco-Jay tried for a punch, an attempt at knocking out one of the orcses, he hit, striking the greenskin with a glancing blow. The orc sucked it up. Returned the favour by trying to chop Paco up, the orc missed, as did his buddy. Lyn was tagged by an enemy orc. The two elves tried to rush in to help. Ezekiel however started to open up a serious can of whoop-ass on these monsters, striking three successive hits with his open-palm style Crushing Blow downing orc after orc. Even Paco-Jay was wrestling with them, getting the enemy into holds, throws, and finally, when the bad-guys had failed there morale check, managed to clobber one over the head with a stray torch, unlit (he played a coupon that granted him additional attacks for next three rounds). Ezekiel also managed a hit on the fleeing orcs. However, everyone had to get going, and we wrapped it up there. It's nice to have the band back together after such a lull. Ezekiel made it to level three, as did Paco-Jay Meadri, Maggy is very near her next levels on both her mage and rogue sides, and Maud has almost reach level nine smuggler. See you all very soon for the next session, which should be a whole lot more regular now thank goodness. Woohoo! Rovus on! Stay on the flex y'all! Max-out.

[Maxen]

(This is a preliminary thread, I am typing it up as we speak, so watch out, stay on the flex, never mind all the rest)

The Tower of Craggen Vale (On the flex rovus adventure based loosely on The Citadel of Chaos and The Forest of Doom Fighting-Fantasy game-books, numbers two and three respectively.

April foolsday rovusesh' written up at 3 A.M., April, 2011 A.D.

Glastonb'ry the one-eyed, one-legged beggar walked through the streets in the village of Milborne. Local youths threw stones at him, he was shunned and marginalised in society, Glaston' trudged on unfettered. It seemed to him that he had had just about enough he could take for today. Picking up his begging bowl and megre coppers, he walked out beyond the village, through the forest of Yore, and further into the willow-vale. The old veteran reached the stream running near Black-Tower, only to notice a boyish looking warrior striding through the undergrowth. Tehlu Aguna spied the grizzled old cripple, saying hello. She had been looking for a potential street-urchin hireling, a would-be henchman, with the possibility of prepping a P.P.C. (potential player character, in Hack-Master, the mentor-protegé system) yet after giving Glaston' a quick once-over, she considered him not fit for service, on account of him being an amputee, having only one eye, and indeed only one arm in working order. He looked pretty depressed as well. (See accompanying non-player character profile, attached zip archive)

Glasters.zip

Glasters the beggar

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The two parted ways amicably. As the charlatan from Stonæ moved towards the site of broken-spire, the entrance ruin to the secluded Black-Tower, she came across some people. Namely Ezekiel (also from the city of Stonæ) and Paco-Jay Meadri, recognising her comrade in arms, Tehlu hailed Paco, who nodded in recognition. The black-elven death-mage was taking the armour off a fallen orc prison-guard, and donning it himself. After getting something to cover the prison rags he had been adorned in, Paco dressed, then introduced Tehlu to Ezekiel, and another mysterious new-comer who went by the name of Bodrik the black-elf, another adventurer. Who had materialised seemingly out of nowhere, and was a complete stranger to the home-grown crew, but was welcomed on the fact that they needed a cleric. (The usual necessities, we needed a healer. Not that priests of Kazar'freem can actually heal nor enter hand-to-hand combat, sheesh!) So the fellowship would have to make do with the charges remaining on Tehlu's Staff of Healing, she didn't let slip that she was capable of casting Druid-spells, ergo: healing, and she could cast Wizard-spells, the charlatan kept it all under-wraps, telling the two new-comers that she was in-fact a he (with the aid of the Hat of Disguise), and that he was a warrior, a fighter. Anyway, let's get back to cases. The rogues and mages looted the bodies, while the clerics and monks sat back looking upon the scavengers, in disgust. Tehlu merely smiled, as did Paco, who took only one lone gold-piece for his share (the death-mage had all of his worldly possessions recently taken off of him. Having busted out of the joint, then managed to liberate his new-found companion Ezekiel, last sesh').

Maud McFinnigan went in search of her rival, Sophia of Eltharion (both N.P.C.'s for this session), but neither princess could find each other. It was whispered in the wind that Mauds', daughter: Maggy McFinnigan the second could be on her way to broken-spire, sometime in the not too distant future. Meanwhile, the new-comer, Bodrik the black-elven zealot recounted the tale of the Black-Tower, about how the evil-overlord Balthrus Dire was planning on taking over the Craggen Vale, and beyond, all the way to the forest of Yore, and the whole of willow-vale.

The four heroes (Tehlu, Paco-Jay, Ezekiel and Bodrik) came to the front gate of the citadel (see accompanying image this is really old-skool by the way).

The entrance to the Citadel

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Paco and Ezekiel decided to tell these misshapen monstrosities what-for by demanding to see their employer, about recovering their lost personal effects. The ape-headed dog-like creature asked for money. Bodrik cast Detect Evil, the guards grew wary and cautious before realising t'was not an offensive spell. Tehlu, who had been buttering them up before hand, fast-talked her way in by some smooth blagging, she did not have to pay the bribe. Paco used his only coin to pay for passage through the tower entrance. Bodrik was just about to pay the man and waltz through before his friend Ezekiel said, “I wouldn't usually ask for much money, any in-fact, but I think I may need to borrow a gold-peice.” The kindly priest payed for his monk friends' bribe as well as his own.

Once through the gates, differences of opinion about what to do were divided. Initially Ezekiel suggested sticking together, whilst Bodrik was in favour of spreading out. Then Ezekiel went off on his own, using his Levitate monk ability, as well as his martial-arts manoeuvre All-round sight to be aware of the bizarre shadowy figures the could see inhabiting the darkness. Tehlu stood and surveyed what she could of the scene. Bodrik followed in close behind Ezekiel, who floated along only to have an arrow whisk past him. Trying to identify the source of the mysterious missile, he could not do so, only reading some guy in front of Paco-Jay. Who had by this time, made his way around the walled edge of the courtyard, only to happen upon this geezer (see accompanying image)

Encounter with some weird guy

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The man was obviously in pain, evidently having been hit about the head with some sort of blunt instrument. He begged for the fellow-wizard to use this spell-book and components to cure him of his ailments (Paco gains the spell-book The Tome of Craggen-Vale containing the following dweomers: Extra Sensory Perception, Fireball: Sidewinder – Factor I, Phantasmal Force, Levitate, Magick Shield, and Ray of Enfeeblement)

The spells written therein that only function within the area between the forest of Yore, and willow-vale were: Creature Copy, Fool's Gold, Luck and Strength spells. Paco-Jay, being a good-natured soul, immediately tore out the page of the only healing-type spell in there, and cast Strengthen Stamina on the guy, ruining the reverse-side spell Skill Boost, both spells perishing instantaneously. (I completely forgot as the Grift-Meister that necromancy specialists aren't allowed to cast spells which aid any living creatures). It's just as well: turns out the wounded guy was in the last stages of becoming a magickally-animated lifeless zombie, so he turned around and bit Paco-Jay on the arm!

While all this excitement was going on, Tehlu spied the two groups, considering carefully which one to follow. For a while Bodrik back-pedalled, pondering to retrace his path back to where Paco was, before going forward behind Ezekiel. Another arrow shot out from the darkness. Again our front-fighter monk tried for an untrained Juggling skill-check, failing. I think Bodrik passed his, tossing the third arrow out of the air to the floor. Ezekiel made a dash for the fountain in the centre of the courtyard, he got clipped on the way there, by another trio of arrows, but he made it. As did Bodkin. Paco-Jay fended off the ungrateful dead, knocking the zombie guy out senseless before patting him down for valuables. Tehlu followed in the direction of the teams holy-men, took an arrow-hit then cleared the distance between he and they.

The fountain actually turned out to be a temple of zyandal, the black-elven spider-queen.

The fountain

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Three gremlins flew around as many chalices in a stone temple. They sipped from the vessel with the pestle: the brew that is true. A grey, murky liquid seemed to be making the imps laugh, before noticing the home-brew boys, and scarpering, sharpish. The other two goblets were filled with a reddish liquid, another chalice was a clear liquid, like water. Ezekiel being in the lead was first to sample the victuals. The grey milky fluid giving him a buzzing sensation, making him giddy, light-headed. He started to laugh, then thought he'd try a bit of the red-liquid. This caused a potion mixture mishap (another reason for playing Hack-Master, you don't get mixing potion behaviour tables except in Hack-Journal number, see accompanying image)

Point Miscibility Tables only exist in Hack-Master, not 3.5 nor 4th edition

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so anyway, poor old Ezekiel was unfortunately unaware of this particular nuance of the ruleset, and after he had declared his action, mixed the two. Some weird effect happened, can't remember what, then Ezekiel vomited, went outside for some fresh-air. Just then Bodrik, second on the scene, thought it'd be fun to mix up all three, the concoction fizzing and fuming, thought he'd give it a go anyway, ended up in a puddle of potion after a subsequent explosion. The group left hurriedly after that. Moving swiftly on. They snuck past the hidden sharpshooters, and double backed to where Paco was. Who, by now, had discovered some sort of pipeline running just proud of the floor. As the others arrived, Chopper (Bodrik's elven wardog Animal Companion) sniffed at the drain. As soon as his sensitive nose connected with the drain, it lept up out of the air (see image)

Laying pipe

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and grabbed the poor warhounds' leg.

The others tore in there attacking the thing, punching, kicking and cutting with little or no effect. They tried to free the hampered dog before Chopper used his Entangle spell-ability to animate the thing away. Sniffing about for any sign of the horrid tentacle lingering, Chopper found a rock that crumbled, giving way to a lever, one telepathic bark later and the home-brew boys found a secret passageway into the citadel. In actual fact I will 'fess up and tell you people about what actually happened. I had several instances of the Citadel of Chaos open and must have flicked to the wrong paragraph, as I sit here later on trying to figure out what in the hell happened, I realised that the team never encountered the guardian of the inner citadel, which they would have to have done, had I been more on the flex.

On the way through the tunnel they just happened to bump into Maggy McFinnigan the second. Who was wandering the corridors searching aimlessly for adventure, well primarily the loot. The fellowship now numbered five. Journeying on they came to a door. Maggy picked the lock then peering inside. She beheld the sight of a very small man whom she recognised, hovering above a table, asleep. (see accompanying image,

O'Seamus, grandaddy O'Finnigan the first

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naturally) He seemed incredibly familiar from somewhere. Then it came to her. From the royal gallery she had seen old oil-paintings of her ancestor – O'Seamus the Leprechaun. Father of Sæmus O'Finnigan the first. Before she could think another thought a missile flew towards her. Warily everyone drew their weapons before a flying tomato hit Maggy squarely in the face. The monk moved forward, O'Seamus opened an eye, smiled, laughed and told them t'was but a joke, in his Eire-like brogue. He warmly extended a hand to the monk, who readily accepted the offer of friendship from a would-be new acquaintance. The nerves gave out on the monks' arm (who was now at -1 to hit for the time being) as his hand ceased up. Before he could do a thing, O'Seamus seemed to have turned into a dummy, which he could not let go of. While feeling gradually returned to his arm, Ezekiel span about to see the little leprechaun appear behind him. Laughing again the monk took it on the chin, so to speak. Anyway, after deciding not to beat on the little prankster, the group asked his advice about the way ahead. The leprechaun advised against going the way they were but that only three doors lay ahead to choose from. Brass, copper, and bronze handled doorways. His clue was, “Two of the doors are very dangerous, and one is a bit funky. Let's see...I would not take the one two doors to the left of the copper-handled one, nor the door to the right of the bronze-handled one.” After the team drawing maps of the area, discussing in-depth about which door to take, they settled on the copper-handled one. Tehlu cast Hypnotism on Mr. O'Seamus. Who failed both his Magick Res' roll and his spell-save'. Sure enough the little leprechaun guinea-pig had to take his own advice, there was a flash, followed by a guttural snarl then a scream. Maggy looked in horror as she saw her grand-daddy go down a corridor, round a corner, then get splattered against the opposite wall, claret all over the joint. She tried to recover what was left of his remains only to fall back to central (the three doors chamber).

They tried another door. This time some invisible stalker started grabbing at them so they fell back. Trying the last door, the corridor crept round and back on itself, before coming out where O'Seamus could still be seen being ripped to pieces. Trying again to help the little man, the whole team lapsed into unconsciousness, simultaneously. The scene faded, then reappeared as though through misty rippling water, the sound of a harp running up and down the scale could be heard, as they returned to reality. It had all been an elaborate illusion, by O'Saemus, who was perfectly fine. Giggling away. “You are indeed good sports, and the way ahead is fraught with danger. Take these.” said Seamus, offering the home-grown crew a silver mirror and a magick-sword (a Bastard Sword+1). He also bestowed upon Paco-Jay a spell-book, after hearing mention of his plight, having lost all his gear. Grandaddy Seamus gave him the gift of the Shadowtome. He also gave his only grand-child two tomes. A double-whammy Codicil of Snilloc the White, and also one entitled “Diary of the Dales” but was actually called Against the Undead (so as not to offend Paco-Jay the death-mage). Last but not least, Seamus gave the only other wizardly type a spell-book, a copy of the fabled Travelling Spell-Book of Elminster. (All these liber were from Pages from the Mages, 2nd edition Fading Realms import jobbie, Maxi-Flex.) The three doors remained ahead of them, perhaps for real this time.

Taking the copper-handled door, the team wound up in a wine-cellar (see picture)

The Black-Elf Vintner

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that was manned by a proud black-elf vintner. He spoke well of his own home-made vintage wines, some of which had magickal properties. Bodrik tried the red, it revitalised him completely (restoring 2 Hit-Points, as well as giving the first taster of the wine present a +3 to all d20 rolls for the remainder of the adventure.) The (at this point) still badly wounded Ezekiel tried some red, then a dash of white, which was awful and made him wretch. Tehlu tapped him with a charge from the Staff of Healing.

Man, it's like 6:30 afore midi here, and I have a gig today, I should totally get some zee's but I just love slinging dice, rolling, home-style. It's fuzzy on the edge of my vision with fatigue. It's not like we even roasted any Icewindale this evening, it's just that the adventure ran until it's conclusion for once, which was nice for a change. Even if only two of them had enough 'grit to finish the last round'. Still, that's reflected in the Exp. gravy-train that the remaining duo rode later on, cleaning up. ANYhow. Wagwan? On the flex. Twifter-time. B.R.B.

Maggy McFinnigan singed up for the Rosérum wine tasting, truth-telling therapy session. That's right, the crafty black-elf vintner had slipped her some truth-serum wine. She soon sang like tweety-pie! Much to the other players' amusement. Meanwhile, the drayman offered them some more of his red, magickal healing wine. Then departed gracefully, immediately running and telling Balthrus Dire everything of the home-brew crew's plan to foil his impending invasion, by assassinating him. Alas, the home-grown crew were hot on his tail. The sneaky little black-elf had locked the door behind him. Someone asked, “Can anyone open locks?” to which Maggy, whilst still under the effects of the serum replied truthfully, “Yes!” She proceeded to open the locked door. The posse gave chase.

Giving chase after the fleeing sound of footsteps, the team eventually came to a door, after negociating a set of windey tunnels and stairs. They entered the following room (here's the artwork for this place).

The Golem

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Seeing three treasure chests, set into what looked like dried mud. A crudely carved stone statue, table, and chair, as well as a door on the opposite wall. Some of our team tried communicating with the statue, who stood still, inanimate, lifeless. Maggy went for the chests, and managed to get the first one open with another successful Open Locks check, it had inside a silver-key. To which the Stone Golem suddenly came to life, striding towards our people. (This beast is worth a whopping eight-grand Exp.) Roll initiative time boys! Spells were let off, the posse tried their best to wallop the thing. They soon realised it needed +2 or better weapons to hit, Ezekiel tried Crushing Blow as it's tailored to work against stone, (monks' hands don't count as magickal weapons in this edition, it's hardcore not pussy-whipped!) I let him off, saying that if he managed to accrue enough damage to crush 2” of stone, that it would work, seeing as it was the most appropriate course of action, within his power. He tried, rolled 'dem bones, failing by only 2%. Close, but no cigar. Tehlu went for a spell, cancelled then had a mishap as a result, rolling some unfortunate result on the D1000 wild-surge style table in the GMG; it can't have been that bad as she walked away with only a minor disadvantage to her character. She then clobbered it for a shed-load with her Scimitar+2. Maggy recovered some of the stone to use in a Glitterdust spell. Bodrik invoked his Djinn Tornado spell-ability from being a Wind-Walker priest career. It tore the golem up for ten points or so. Maggy used her unidentified magickal arrows to great effect, damaging it some. Tehlu ended up battering it down with a load of attacks from her magickal Scimitar+2. Maggy tried to Open Locks on the remaining two chests. It didn't work. Neither did forcing the locks. So she tried the silver-key in the lock, it fit! Inside this container was a green-coloured key. Which opened the third box, which had in it a jar, containing a spider. After a moments inspection, the weird little creature seemed to have the face of an old man. Paying it no mind, the crew moved on.

As did Maxy Waxy in real life, after doing a gig at River Cottage in the presence of the eminent H.F.W. I'm back home some time later, ready to write up the session, if a little sozzled on red and green. You people prolly don't know what that means, well, some of you do no doubt, but needless to say, I'm on the flex. More red than green if you catch my drift. I have enough food to keep me going thanks to my folks, whiskey and cheech I have to score for myself though, which is cool. No wucking furries Davey-boy, stay on the flex. Okay boys, I'm gonna lay it on the line here. Should we be wasting our lives talkin' shoot about some imaginary world, or, should we learn to love?... I just met this girl (she was there when I became 'a man', only moderators would be able to see the thread that I deleted about how real life is better than rovus) anyway, back to this woman, we've been text-messaging each other and I am more than a little infatuated with her. She's fit, twenty-something and digs me. This could be really cool, 'getting some' from a hot mamma, might just beat slingin' dice and talking shoot. I really need to get laid people, it's been too long (like a year at least, not since I was in France last) so anyway, I put it to you: Ukrp, that playin' music and making love to beautiful women beats the hell out of rovus. Even so, I promise to write up the rest of this session in good time, I will do so, as besides making music and then dancing to a music only the soul can hear (Gemmell), rovus is my favourite hobby. Intellectual intercourse. Stimulating my brain cells, not just my genitalia.

(Next evening write-up, I'm wired, just as tired, somewhat less drunk, but far more chilled-out. Hobbit-style.) Getting back on the flex, the team left the Golem room, opened the door, and stepped forward into a passageway, which ran eastwards for several yards, then came to an end at the foot of a staircase. Climbing the stairs, the U.H.G.C. (Underground Home-Grown Crew) found themselves in another narrow passageway. It came out into a large, well lit room. (See artwork) By the way, I'd like to thank the late Lynard Skynyrd for getting me through this write up, as well as my inspiration: Kelly Joe Phelps. Man I've been cookin' wit' gas on the steel-string gee-tar, that gig was flippin' mEnTaL! I went on after s- sorry. I digress. Focus Maxy. So the U.H.G.C. reached the dining hall.

The Long Haul comes to an end

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Bodrik inspected some of the armour on the wall. Listen man, I'm gonna call it a night, what having work in the morning, night people. I just made it back from work, tired, hungry, and cannot be bothered to write any more, but will type up the showdown they had with Balthrus Dire as soon as I can>

Next sesh we're due to see the return of Sophia, I've managed to twist his arm into attending, if only to settle the honour duel biatch-fight between her and Maud. For the crown. The Elfaen-Forest. The power and the glory. I'm not sure who would win, so have no favourite either side. Also, 'tis the Grift-Meisters' job to keep things fair, remain neutral, impartial to his duties of arbitration. Even so, it could go either way (this isn't fourth edition, if it were Sophia wouldn't stand a chance, due to the difference in levels) anyway, Maud is nearly a ninth level smuggler, (in the red corner) who is I fear, not wanting to show her rival any sort of mercy (hence the usual confines of an honour duel will not apply so much, i.e. Not killing, nor using any weapons, magick or armour!) So, (in the green corner) comes the formidable Sophia of Eltharion, level four (I think) Battlemage, who is likely to spank Maud with a shed load of spells, if it does get out of hand, and if Maud's daughter, Maggy (heaven forbid) should pile in there, I figure that it is only fair to bring in the rest of the Eltharion family dynasty to Sophia's side. Which will of course, entail the other side of the royal court getting involved (wait for it) meaning the return of the evil magelord-racketeer Sæmus O'Finnigan the first. Before this whole train-wreck of a campaign sparks of some kind of P.vs.P bloodbath, I will attempt to avert disaster by advising the players to settle their score honourably. Not the old irish way (3.5) of having no honour, and fighting to kill, but instead, bowing to the almighty Hack-Master, Queensbury house-rules. First to three knock downs (although I will allow as G.M. a successful wrestling pin attempt. By this I mean, maintaining a hold for three rounds. One! Two! Three! And he's outta there!) Although I am much more of a boxing aficionado myself, having Conan as company over the years has given me a reluctant fondness for wrestlers. Usually from watching UFC, betting on the boxer, then often loosing the sportsmans bet and some face. Anyhow, y'all. See you soon. Stay on the flex.

Addenum: well, looks like we're all set for the next session, in the blazing hot sunshine of this rather unusually scorching April. It could be that we're doing Hannibal's campaign this week, so Ezekiel and Bodrik will have to run NPC's for the moment (until they take the time to make new characters, we've spent the last few session sitting rolling up characters so have been unable to start for quite some time.) so anyway, it looks to be good, might be alright. I still have the remainder of the last session to write up so that'll take some time. I am actually really busy with Dr. Faustus and my university thesis. It's really intense, and pitches way above the heads of American Trash (a.k.a. Fantasy Books which we all so love to immerse ourselves in) try reading Elizabethan literature, it's far superior to fantasy rubbish! The quality of the writing back then is so much more polished, eloquent. It's unbelievable inspiration for making my campaign setting, and roleplaying system. Which, by the way, is coming along famously. We have the art piling in now, and I have written a wealth of material for it. Stay on the flex y'all. Max-out.

[Maxen]

Last half of the session: A concise write up from a patchy memory of what might have happened.

So, where were we? Oh yes, Bodrik inspected a suit of plate armour on backed against the wall, it began to move as though animated by some unseen spirit. Gazing in awe of this life-like dynamic object, it was suddenly still as quickly as it started to move. Eerily quiet, the armour stood static. Bodrik tried it on, it didn't fit.

Meanwhile, someone went to look at the paintings adorning the walls. No-one had the needed Art Appreciation skill in order to be any sort of authoritative critique. Having no frame of reference, the un-educated observer lost a wound due to being instilled with a sense of dread, from the imposing nature of the masterpiece. There stood Balthrus Dire, a terrifying image. Even so, the onlooker felt better for having seen their opponent, gleaning some knowledge of what was to come (gaining +1 on all rolls for the remainder of the adventure.)

The team entered a brightly coloured room (see artwork)

Strange Room

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filled with mannequins. Some small creatures with green skin played. An open chest could be seen in the room. Paco-Jay gave them some of his rations, the orcish-type children seemed distracted enough by this for Maggy McFinnigan II to peruse the chest, it was just filled with toys and junk. The crew crept past and headed down the corridor.

I realise that I messed up again here, being one paragraph out of sync. The team entered a room haunted by spirits (see art).

Weird Creature

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They were unable to effect the spirits with any spells, nor items they had found along there journey. They were flung from the tower, taking 3D6 H.P. worth of falling damage. Dusting themselves off, they began to decide upon another course of action. The crew needed a rest, to heal-up, and re-memorize spells. I had been pushing them forward hard, creating a sense of urgency. So they kept the momentum going on for the moment, finding themselves in the courtyard once more. They spied a whirling shape (see art

Cover of CitadelOfChaos

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) that soon seemed to knock people off there feet. The priest Bodrik said, “I could try and command her.” My knee-jerk automatic response was “Priests do not have special powers to do so.” to which he quite rightly replied, “This one does! I'm running a specialist-priest of Kazar'freem, god of the air, it's one of my few special abilities.” So with that, it saw the whirlwoman off.

They then saw two groups of figures, they encountered these two fellows here (see artwork).

Two figures in the darkness

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They were arguing over the price of a dagger. The newcomers (U.H.G.C) were asked how much it was worth, Ezekiel said it was worth only a little coin (he was a monk and therefore not materialistic). The little man (in the picture) was most upset at hearing this, telling everybody that it's value was assured, due to the fine craftsmanship and gemstones set into it's hilt. The little guy was peeved at hearing this opinion, a fight ensued. The team bested the little man easily.

Deciding to leave the Black-Tower, the crew headed out. Bodrik and Ezekiel headed back to Milborne, whilst Maggy and Tehlu passed the night in the forest of Yore. As the azure sunset of dusk covered the sky, they passed Yazotromo's tower only to find it raised to the ground, and the duo also discovered a hidden stash of items: several magick Potions including Healing, Plant Control, Stillness, Insect Control & Anti-Poison; they also happened upon a vial of Holy Water, a Net of Entanglement, a Rod of Water-finding, some Buds of Wild-Garlic, three Fire-Acorn Capsules and a pair of Nose Filters. They decided to strike out further into the forest, lest whoever burned the tower down came back.

The night passed uneventfully. When the two awoke, they found some strange purple mushrooms. Maggy gathered a few carefully, for later inspection. Whereas the bold Tehlu just took some for the crack. He had eaten mix-up mushrooms, swapping out his Luck talent bonus (+1 on all D20 rolls) for his STR To-Hit bonus, for the remainder of the adventure. While initially annoyed by this, when we all worked out that this would actually benefit his character for the time-being, Tehlu was calm once more.

A little lost, the two rogues headed north, then the pathway turned eastwards, then north again. The two happened upon a Treeman (see artwork).

Entish

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Maggy cast Wall of Fire burning his companion badly but also slaying the Ent. Alas, they healed up and tried to find there way back to Black-Tower. They did so in good time, without so much complication. Passed the usual two door-guards, paying the nominal bribe of one gold-penny (a half-crown or sceattæ), then once inside, the two adventurers happened upon a camp fire, with some suspicious looking likely characters sat about it. (see artwork)

The encounter

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An orc seemed to be giving out meet, a couple giggled playfully, and the other figure regarded the newcomers with disdain. The two adventurers decided to ask them if it was alright to join them. They were received with a warmer reaction than the initially frostiness. The orc even opened up to them, sharing a password, telling the U.H.G.C. that in order to pass, they need give the word “Scimitar.” Then the people started getting agitated as the U.H.G.C. showed an over-active interest in the vial of liquid they were arguing over. Curious as to what was inside the vial, the group of orcs and the gully dwarf lept up and attacked. The woman screamed. It wasn't long before our heroes made mincemeat of the monstrosities. The vial turned out to be near-useless. Such a high price paid in blood for a near feckless item. Oh well. As per usual, they patted down the slain greenskins, then made there way to where the tentacle was, and into the secret passage leading to the dining hall. Up the staircase, the two came into another room containing... (see work of art).

Six-headed beast they bested

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The fighting was fierce. After a very very tough struggle, Tehlu managed to sever four of the things six heads. It slunk back out in to the next room. Our charlatan was down to only seven or so hit-points, and even the mage Maggy was down to half her H.P. Even so, the two pushed on. (Please whoevers reading this realize that so far the U.H.G.C. have taken-down a stone-golem and a six-headed hydra, and they're only fourth level on average, also, each of those beasts are worth nine or so grand in Exp. Value! No way could that ever happen in fourth edition/world of wakraft) Anyway. Cue Carmine Burana by Orff (the music from the 1980's Old-Spice advert' somewhat akin to the choral theme in the film Phantom Menace) as it was the final showdown with the bad-ass Balthrus Dire himself. (see art)

Endgame

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There lay before them, a scene of willow-vale in miniature, battle forces deployed in a strategic map, with many miniature models, representing his various regiments, laid out on a field of scenic grass. As Balthrus healed the wounded Hydra, so did Tehlu try and heal himself and his companion. It wasn't long before everybody was out of spells. Seeing as Balthrus Dire is effectively a 19th level spell-sword, it didn't look like the two stood much of a chance. I evened the odds a little by having grandaddy Seamus and his son Saemus O'Finnigan staple a Hat of Stupidity to Balthrus' head before he entered combat, rendering all his spell-casting useless. Then Saemus and son became invisible and scarpered, as per usual. Anyway, the wounded, but headless Hydra was finally taken-down by Tehlu, after a long, drawn-out struggle. Balthrus Dire was still a formidable opponent, apart from the fact that he was not proficient in his main weapon (mages are not allowed to be trained in scimitars in this system, and rightfully so, they're too powerful as it is!), so Balthrus took the usual to-hit penalties for wizards, using weapons they're not permitted (a whopping -8 to hit, but being 19th level meant Balthrus was still hitting them on the roll of a four or more on a D20), alas, Maggy tried to use her Cricket In The Pea-Pod skill to try and get behind the nineteenth level battlemage. She failed. She also went for the back-stab in the following rounds, three times she made her Stealth roll, and was able to move in position, but thrice she failed her attack roll, even with the huge +4 bonus! Tehlu took crit' resulting in him dropping his weapon, he started using his bare fists Fung Chi stylee to fight off the Hydra, as makeshift fighter, albeit with a to-hit matricies of a wizard! All seemed lost. At this point the team were bleating, whining, in desperation. Someone else appeared, a familiar face that had been shadowing them since the adventure began, seeking Tehlu's approval. Glasters the beggar-man waded into Balthrus Dire, from out of nowhere, and boom! Yep, you guessed it! A nat' 20! He caused serious bleeding after rupturing Balthrus Dire's spleen. Landing a severity level seven critical hit on the enemy battlemage. The U.H.G.C. managed to hold out for another four rounds (but only just!) before surviving that near impossible adventure: the Citadel of Chaos. I'll leave you with the stats for Glasters.

NPC saviour

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That was one hell of a session. Tehlu is now leve six (I think), whilst Maggy has nearly levelled up on both her mage and rogue sides (about six-grand, that's twelve effectively until she's headin' on up). This session we didn't have anyone turn up, except my good friend Saemus, we roasted some Icewindale, my bard is now officially level six! As for next time, I hope the fellowship re-forms. I just bumped into Bodrik and he said he'd be there next time, which means Ezekiel should be as well. Maggy will be here. I don't know about the others. Most of my time is taken up now either playing shows or working towards my university course The History of Art. I have now gained Art Appreciation skills and subsets, in real life. I was always a practising performance artist, but now have read, understood and have therefore gained a greater understanding of what art is, and is not. I can't wait to attain a masters degree in this, my chosen field. We're reading The Faber Book of Beasts at the moment, and I must say what a huge inspiration it is for writing roleplaying games and adventures. The university course keeps me tied down here, so I cannot visit friends up-north or further afield in the Vosgienne mountains, where I long to be. Alas, the grass is ever greener. I'll leave you with some more magickal quotes from Elizabethan England, the literary scene (which is far superior to contemporary dross, even my own attempts, which pale in comparison to the great writers: Marlowe, Shelly, Keats, Spenser, Shakespeare, Byron, Scott, Thomas, etcetera.) We are all nothing. Even if you pretend you are not. Humbled by the great imagineers of the past. This doesn't mean we cannot try to better ourselves, by writing more, but any would-be authors are advised toward humility. Let it be known that the works of 'literature' and 'fantasy' are kept in completely separate sections in both libraries and book shops: for a damn good reason. Jordan could not compare to Shakespeare, as Feist cannot hope to match Marlowe. Read real literature, not vein trifles of fantasy, and you'll soon understand what I mean...

"He surfeits upon cursed necromancy; Nothing so sweet as magick is to him."

"How am I glutted with conceit of this! Shall I make spirits fetch me what I please?
resolve me of all ambiguities, perform what desperate enterprise I will?
I'll have them fly to India for gold, ransack the ocean for orient pearl,
and search all corners of the new-found world for pleasant fruits and princely delicates;
I'll have them read me strange philosophy, and tell the secrets of all foreign kings;
...I'll levy soldiers with the coin they bring, and chase the Prince of Parma from our land,
and reign sole king of all the provinces; Yea, stranger engines for the brunt of war,
than was the fiery keel at Antwerp's bridge, I'll make my servile spirits to invent...
Valdes, and Cornelius, know that your words have won me at the last
to practice magick and concealed arts: yet not your words only, but mine own fantasy,
that will receive no object; for my head but ruminates on necromantic skill.
Philosophy is odious and obscure; Both law and physic are for petty wits;
Divinity is basest of the three, unpleasant, harsh, contemptible, and vile:
'Tis magick, magick, that hath ravish'd me. Then, gentle friends, aid me in this attempt;
and I, that have with concise syllogisms."

Cornelius: "The miracles that magick will perform, will make thee vow to study nothing else.
He that is grounded in astrology, enrich'd with tongues, well seen in minerals,
Hath all the principles magick doth require: then doubt not, Faustus, but to be renowm'd,
And more frequented for this mystery than heretofore the Delphian oracle.
The spirits tell me they can dry the sea, and fetch the treasure of all foreign wrecks,
Aye, all the wealth that our forefathers hid within the massy entrails of the earth:
Then tell me, Faustus, what shall we three want?"

Faustus: "O, this cheers my soul! Come, show me some demonstrations magickal."

Cornelius: "Valdes, first let him know the words of art; And then, all other ceremonies learn'd,
Faustus may try his cunning by himself."

Valdes: "First I'll instruct thee in the rudiments, and then wilt thou be perfecter than I."

Faustus: "Then come and dine with me, and, after meat, we'll canvass every quiddity thereof;
For, ere I sleep, I'll try what I can do: This night I'll conjure, though I die therefore..."

- excerpts from Christopher Marlowe's "Dr. Faustus" Act I, scene i.

[Maxen]

I can confirm that Hannibal will be DMing next session. 'Cassidy' will be running a kick-ass Ogre Fighter (STR 19, DEX 16, CON 17, even INT & WIS 13), so should be there. I'll be running my Ranger, as per usual. Bodrik and Ezekiel will have to make-do running pre-fabs NPC for the moment. Saemus too will have to either build a new character in between time, or make do running an NPC (the leprechaun was for his Pixie-Fae campaign) This is gonna RULE! I love being a player, and not have to worry about DMing. Paco-Jay might even be making an appearance.

HAPPY SAINT GEORGE'S DAY EVERYBODY! Vive Angleterre!

Listen, we've been having a MAD session of rovus since I last posted, I have umpteen sessions to write up, and we're looking good, going to have more this next session coming up, watch this space for it's gonna be real. Hannibal is too sullen to come but attended last group, neither Bodrik nor Ezekiel were there last time be here this time. Gerhard/PJ as per usual, Valraven Yumi, and the return of Saemus O'Finnigan the First. Lots and lots of rovus write-ups to do. Stay on the flex. Maximus

[Maxen]

A one-time appearance from Paco-Jay this time running a Beast-Friend (aka Animalist) with fellow adventurers Maggy McFinnigan and Valraven. They all mooched on through the forest, o'er hills, from dappled dale to down-trodden swamps, the mire. The Underground Home-Grown Crew (U.H.G.C.) happened upon some wildcats while they slept. It was a fierce encounter, which took all night to resolve, I recall our Beast-Master character using Druid spells to some effect on the dozen or so Snattacats that attacked the U.H.G.C.. Maggy Cained them with spells, took some damage while she was in there, as did our Beast-Friend. Alas Valraven wasted some wildcats, so did his comrades. One failed morale check, and an attack of opportunity later and the Snattacats were history.

After pressing on through the swamp, Valraven and Maggy stumbled across an irate man, dressed in pelts, with two wolves accompanying him the wolf-man bade them leave his home. Our heroes after some deliberation, decided not to slay him and did as they were asked, moved back out of the swamp and headed to the city of Port Orphalese.

Along the way the tribe met Tehlu Aguna, also Ezekiel and Bodrik. At the gates, a mean looking guard eyed them warily. His insignia blazoned onto his armour, denoted a serviceman of high rank, really someone. He asked for a bribe. This didn't bother Tehu who immediately offered to 'service him' (du pip') and the scamster made it passed without paying the gold crown bribe.

The others had to cough up. Just after Tehlu had finished her dirty work, she rifled through the guys pockets (failed pickpocket attempt) and the guard started to kick off, until Valraven used Paralyzing Touch Martial Arts ability to put the guy out. Then Tehlu and Valraven started to bicker in the busy city streets, as the guard slept like a baby. Paco-Jay (who was playing Paco-Jay this day) cast Ray of Enfeeblement after Valravens second Paralyzing Touch attack, put all combatants - except for the wizards - frozen, unabe to act. Once they'd recovered their senses, the posse put aside their differences and sketched off before the guard woke. The U.H.G.C. had to now bribe another two guards to gain access to the city park: Tehlu got down and dirty again, went to work with the CoMeatSandwich, they passed them without too much excess saliva. Everyone was happy, especially the guards.

They sneaked off left down Silversmith Street, to the park. Here they saw an overgrown fountain, mossy, lush. A breeze blew, the leaves in the trees swirled, formed into a cyclone, a dust devil shape. One stuck to Valraven, burning his skin, he tore it off. Everyone attacked the sea of magickally animated living leaves from fireweed plants. Spells worked to great effect, especially Telhu's fire-based attacks, Maggy's cold (Icy Spehere) even Paco-Jay beat down a load with his staff.

After a final explosive fire-spell from Tehlu, they moved passed the vanquished living plant, only to see the three guards Tehlu had serviced gossiping, pointing in there direction. More guards were alarmed. A right royal panic ensued. Lord Mayor Hazzur could be heard, arriving in his coach. The U.H.G.C. slayed the three guards with seeming ease, and the dozen halfling-thug militia armed with crossbows, sent in to mow them down. Lord Hazzur arrived, running over an old bag-lady, trampled beneath the hooves and wheels of his coach. A team of wizards and priests surrounded him, began chain casting Otiluke's Resilient Sphere (old skool 2nd ed.import) they conversed with U.H.G.C. who refused to be of service to the city. Things calmed down.

Then they came across a boy with an apple cart, Paco-Jay bought some, he was ill. After that, the team passed an old rubbish bin, it had some dusty old boots in there, Paco-Jay found some Boots of Elvenkind by chance, none too shabby.

They left the city after dressing down some more guards, came across a pixie-wolf, tough fight, it turned out to be an illusion ("it was all just a dream..."), then while exploring the forest they happened upon a lake, where they were attacked by a Kraken they slayed it after a tough and lengthy combat. Then some bats attacked, and a Nandibear, and that's as far as we played. I realize this was a concise write up. It doesn't really do justice to the lengthy thread I have written over this last couple of years. However, it does kinda sum up my feelings about rovus at the moment. My heart is not in it. After seeing three dire attempts at G.M.ing, I thought Paco-Jay was bad (issuing random experience points, WTF?!?!) but then I played when Valraven give us ten-grand Exp. just for accepting the mission!? Um, yeah. WHATever! Also, some personal problems...

[Maxen]

Alas, this is the final and last post I will make on this super-sensitive website. Any further posts will be the odd one-off session, and done on my own website (one that can display an image over 400 pixels across without putting the picture in some scroll-box frame, whereby you cannot see all the image at once, defeating the object of having images! Also somewhere I can upload files larger than a quarter of a megabyte) It's been a good run. I meant to finish my Encyclopedia Sideratus on here but I suddenly realized I was giving away the bestiary for the roleplaying game I am writing - for free! Tsk tsk. Surely I have better business sense than that? Well, of course. All my attempts at getting anything in print through Dave/Mongoose have all come to nothing, so this is just a serious waste of time. Go out and have fun, sit in the sun, meet someone special, sing songs, enjoy yourself, and GET A LIFE: there is more to life than talking shoot (roleplay). Try sex. Drugs. Rock n' Roll. If you're not quite as base as that and need intellectual intercourse to stimulate you, go back to university. Intellectually a lot more stimulating that playing rovus. Wake up and smell the coffee people. There's a whole wide world out there. Not just an imaginary one to escape to in your brain. But something real, that you can touch, smell, savour, relish. Love. Peace. Joy. Forget the geek gyap. Keep it real. Max-out. For good.

[dpmcalister]

No point trying to get anything into print through me - I just run this website. As for your comments about the forum - those restrictions are intentional. There's always the wiki which doesn't have as many restrictions.

Of course, I'm super-sensitive though so don't worry!

[Halfbat]

Maybe it's an idea to suggest to peeps how they can resize their pics without stuffing the quality - the one's above are vast at screen res (900 pixels wide), which eats into most layouts, probably because they've merely got the 96px/inc or similar. I'll check.

[Maxen]

I was wondering about that. Thanks for the tip Half-Bat, sincerely. Listen, Davey-boy, I didn't mean that stuff when I said super sensative. Andf you're not, evidently, I just pasted a load of warhammer threads written by Paco-Jay, I admit I didn't check it for expletives, then when later on I stumbled across a few reading it, and I thought it sincerely comforting knowing you guys didn't gimme any repercussions for the use of foul-language. Sincerely. I am sorry for calling you that. Max.